Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Ask and ye shall receive

Managers, Supervisors, and Executives who struggle to build effective relationships often have trouble with a specific personality trait, they tend to be "tellers" or "commanders", not "askers".  Tellers have a difficult time interacting with people and are ineffective communicators.  They regularly demonstrate poor listening skills and deal poorly with feedback.

Becoming the best leader possible requires the ability to be a sincere "asker".

ASK for opinions...People love to feel important, to feel respected, and to feel needed.  Seeking their opinion, their wise council, speaks to that need.  It also helps to engage the shy or reclusive, and forces the most ardent critics to put up or shut up.

ASK for ideas...This alone opens up worlds of knowledge most vast than your own experiences. Different perspectives leverage the team's abilities and speeds up the improvement process.

ASK questions ... Don't let superficial participation stand unchallenged.  Question the team, draw out the reluctant thoughts, press past the surface and get to the root of peoples thoughts and emotions.   And show that you don't have all the answers, nor do you want to!

ASK for help... This isn't a sign of weakness, its a sign of trust.  Nothing breeds engagement more than showing others that you trust them enough to approach them in a time of need.

And remember that asking for feedback, means that you must listen to what you are being told.  It doesn't mean that all advice need be taken, but it does require that you devote your full attention and consideration to the discussion.

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